All recognizable characters belong to CH
I haven’t seen Eric in 3 days and yeah, I’m sad about it, but more angry than anything.
‘I understand what he’s going through, but come on! I expected that, I did. I knew I probably wouldn’t hear from him, but to not feel him’, I thought to myself.
My need to be a true southern girl never allowed me to go to him or even cry for our separation, but I did miss him. I missed him so terribly, of course I most likely will never tell him that. ‘I’m such a boy’, I smirked.
At first when Ocella and that poor little ‘crazy’ were here I was so overwhelmed with anger with that sick shit. I wanted Eric’s maker dead. So. Finally. dead, that it never occurred to me how it would affect Eric. With all this on my mind, I have to go into an empty house in the woods alone because I assume I was looking worse for wear to Sam. I worked the dinner shift at Merlotte’s thinking I could handle it. I told Eric only a few hours, but he wasn’t here and I was gonna drive myself crazy. I’ll go crazy without Eric, I can’t do one more night without him.
I can’t figure out why Eric hasn’t called me. Only thing that comes to mind is the fact I was going to kill Ocella.
‘No, can’t be, he was fine that night’, I try to convince myself… failed attempt.
Everyone always gets nervous meeting their boyfriend or girlfriend’s parents, but to meet someone’s maker… then want to kill said maker… ugh!
‘Damn, Appius! Being all Appius and evil and stuff! What? I’m definitely going crazy.’ I thought.
After what Eric told me about his maker I was so disgusted and angry when Appius showed up to my house with a little boy in tow. Ok, granted he was no longer a little boy and he was more or less dead when he was made. Either way when he woke up after however many days it takes, he was still a little boy.
‘Whatever, he’s also dead now anyway. Finally dead that is. I am so going to hell.’ I decided.
Whatever. I’m just as dead on my feet now as I have ever been. I am so tired of all the shit and I just want to take a shower and go to bed, cause my body is just…ugh. I just want to relax my brain from doing some serious shielding all day. I mean, it’s good because I need that practice, but I am dog tired now and now that my shields are stronger from all that extra ‘umph’ I guess you’d say, I put into it today. Which is why I’m sure, that I was so shocked to find Eric on my door step, when I came home from work.
“Why are you sitting out here?” I questioned after rushing from my car. He looked so gorgeous with his hair loose and hanging down his shoulders across his black tee, which is my favorite tee he has ever worn. Eric just looked at me clearly noting my shock. I hope he has his side of the bond open now, so he can feel how I feel, because I ‘m not telling him anything on the porch.
‘She misses me’ I thought or hope really. I can’t ignore how angry and tired she is but I hope the missing and loving will overpower those feelings. I have missed her myself, but it was better I kept my distance. I didn’t know how I’d feel and that made me angry. All those emotions made me angry, I didn’t care at all for that asshole Ocella, but here I am mourning him like he actually cared for me. I am nothing like how he was to my child, I will never be that way to Pam. She will never know what it is like to truly fear her maker the way I have. Since I opened the bond, maybe I should help her calm down and relax.
With the way I was feeling, I can’t believe how calm I felt and then I felt a surge of love now, but I didn’t reciprocate.
‘Damnit! I hadn’t felt his love in 3 days, so why now?’ I thought.
Eric was the first to speak as I made it to the door. ” Sookie, do you not love me anymore?” he almost gasped.
‘Oh, how human’, I thought.
I pushed my way passed him and unlocked my door. I let my shields down. I stared at him, knowing full well I was going to rip him a new one, he spoke again. “Sookie, didn’t you hear me I want to know if you still love me” he asked. “I heard you”, I said walking in my unlocked door. He looks like he’s trying to pick an emotion off of me.
‘He’ll be shocked’. I sing-song to myself, childish I know.
I expected love maybe longing, but all I got was irritation, ‘that is unexpected’, I thought. I know I’ve been gone for a few days with no contact, but I thought I’d get more than that. What’s that human phrase? Oh, where’s the love? Hhmm?
I didn’t want to really fight as much as make a point…then make him leave, but when I felt him test the bond, I was over irate. “Eric!”, I yelled. He knows when I yelled his name rather than ‘one of those human endearments’ as he puts it, he knows he’s in trouble. “It’s been 3 days and no nothing. I didn’t expect to hear from you, but to not feel you! What the hell Eric?” I yelled angrily.
“Sookie, you know I love you. I just needed to put things into perspective…” “Perspective! Eric” I yelled cutting him off. I know that he knew he could the anger rising in me.
Oh, there it is, I smiled internally.
It was the only thing I actually loved and scorned at the same time about Sookie… her hot temper. I understand why she is angry with me, I held back the bond. However, she will never understand what it is to have a bond between a maker and child. Even I didn’t think I would react the way I did. I have to steer this to softer ground somehow.
“Yes, Sookie I…” ‘Oh, I don’t think so’, I thought pissed off when Eric tried o say somehing. “I couldn’t feel you for days, I wanted to see you and call you, but I held myself back to let you grieve for your maker…father.” I faltered in guilt. ‘Guilt, ugh!’
I could only stare at him and wonder what was going through his mind. He must be a little angry with me, after all, I was going to kill Appius myself, until I came up with the idea to have him rid us of Victor Madden in exchange for his life. Unfortunately a vengeful fairy beat me to it. Now we have all this extra crap we now have the luck to sift through ourselves.
YAY! Oh lucky me..